...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
