She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
