then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
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