While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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