well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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