Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
