She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
