i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
