Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Randomize
