so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
