Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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