Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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The entire state will know me by my boobs.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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