His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Randomize
