thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
Randomize
