Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
