so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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