plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Pooping to opera.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize