she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Randomize
