Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
