I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
