i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize
