He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The convent might be a nice break from real life
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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