why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
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Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
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When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
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