This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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