winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
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Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
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I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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