I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
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