Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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