Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(308): View more from Nebraska

i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.

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(248): View more from Michigan

she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear

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(207): View more from Maine

It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...

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(704): View more from North Carolina

Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.

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(714): View more from California

I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.

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(630): View more from Illinois

I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS

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(210): View more from Texas

It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.

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(584): View more from

STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!

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(605): View more from South Dakota

Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other

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