so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Randomize