A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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