you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Everything about him screamed your future.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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