So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I currently don't understand fingers.
True college students do jello shots in the library
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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