rhymes with "ouble enetration"
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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