im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
zippers are such a cool invention
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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