Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
pray to the hookup gods
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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