What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
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