Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
Duck Duck Cougar?
i think i have two assholes
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Randomize