i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
another moral hangover. fuck.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
