we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
babies were throwing up all over the place
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
home. puking in laundry basket.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Randomize
