I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Randomize
