from now on my penis is your penis
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize