I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
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