***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
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