Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
