There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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