Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
