There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Are we still banned from the library?
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
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