Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Text me some of your sweat
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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