Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
