is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
