i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
